As is often the case with engagements, ours started something of a trend. Within 12 months of slipping that ring on my finger, no fewer than three of my friends had followed suit and taken those first tentative steps towards marriage.
For the most part, we all threw ourselves into the planning process with great gusto. My husband proposed while we were holidaying in Bali. Almost as soon as we had touched down on the runway at Heathrow, I was on the phone to my best girl friends, asking them to be my bridesmaids. Back at my Mum's house later that day, we set a date, giving ourselves 18 months to organise the celebration. It wasn't that I was in a hurry to get wed, I had an MA to finish before I could even consider walking down the aisle, but the planning part was exciting. I was inspired and full of ideas. More than anything, I was itching to find our dream venue, the perfect photographer, and of course, a dress.
I'll admit it would be easy for me to romanticise the run up to our wedding. For all that enthusiasm, there were tasks I'd have happily passed on. The table plan? Hell. The dreaded wedding budget? Painful. Chasing RSVPs? Infuriating. But for the most part, I loved every minute of it.
One of my friends has been little slower out of the blocks. Nothing wrong with that. People have jobs to do, lives to lead. It's not like she's been slacking! I mean, there's absolutely no need to hurry these things. But over dinner recently, she admitted the wedding had kind of become a 'thing'. A source of dread. A task to be avoided at all costs.
It's not marriage. She wants to be a wife to her chap more than anything. Love is not the issue. No, instead it's the planning. It's the decision making, the money, the expectation, the pressure.
I guess it's easy to feel overwhelmed in a market so saturated with choice. Weddings can throw up no end of family issues, and worrying about what relatives will think of your nuptials is an easy trap to fall into. Us wedding bloggers can tell you a hundred times that 'it's your day', but when it comes down to it, you're the one who has to face your Aunty Joyce in a field with your jam jars and wild flowers and bunting {or you know, whatever}. Thinking outside the box can be easy enough, but persuading others to venture out there with you is no mean feat. And as for the money, well, it's easy to see why that might keep you up at night.
Anyway, as we tucked into our starter {and poured each other another glass of red}, it ocured to me that my dear friend probably wasn't alone in feeling this way. I said as much, and offered to ask our readers how they felt about wedding planning. It's the least I could do 😉
As many of you are newly engaged,
I'm curious to know how you've taken to planning. Has it been a source
of unbridled joy, or has it left you weeping into your wedding
magazines?
Those of you further along in your journey, have you had to overcome
any obstacles {real or imagined} while wedding planning? Did things
start to fall into place of their own accord, or was it hard graft all
the way? What's been the biggest source of worry or stress? What's been
the most fun?
If you planned a wedding and lived to tell the tale, what advice would you give to those just starting out?
Please do share your thoughts in the comments below, if only to let my lovely friend know she's not alone!
Much love,
Franky
